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Why the heck do so few girls respond to me on match.com and myspace?

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My first question is: Why the heck do so few girls respond to me on match.com and myspace?.

My next question is: Background:.

I really like this man I've been seeing.  We've had four dates, all of which lasted hours upon hours and ended with some making out.  He travels a lot, so it's usually a couple/few weeks between dates.  He's admitted that he really likes me, and I told him I'm developing feelings for him, but we've agreed not to take things too seriously at this point. .

This is what happened:.

After our last date, he seemed like he wanted to see me again really soon, but our schedules haven't really meshed lately.  I spoke with him on the phone last Thursday, and he said we should get together on Tuesday around 6:00.  We didn't settle on a definite plan of what to do or where to go, but this is how it usually works with us, so I didn't think anything of it.  I figured I'd get in touch with him early Tuesday, and we'd firm things up.  I emailed him Tuesday at noon to ask where we should meet up.  No response.  At 4:30, I texted him to ask again.  His response was, "Can you meet me at 8:30?"  I texted back to ask if he could possibly meet any earlier, and he responded with, "I have class from 6:00 to 8:00.  I can meet you in midtown if you like."  I suggested we reschedule, and he said okay and offered this Thursday instead. .

Here is my problem:.

How should I take this?  I mean, it seems as if he forgot all about our plans because, if he had remembered, I'd like to think that he would have gotten in touch with me earlier in the day - or the day before - to let me know that we'd have to change them because of his class.  He didn't do that.  I didn't even hear from him until after 5:00. .

Then again, he is kind of flighty on occasion (he's the type that's brilliant but a little bit out there).  And we did agree not to take things too seriously or get too involved for the time being..

So should I take it personally?  What should I do?  Is it really not a big deal?   ..

Comments (6)

Your question was: Why the heck do so few girls respond to me on match.com and myspace?.

#1. Never call more than once in a row. Men see it as pressure. In a man's mind.

Emails+text+phone call= Jail or death by smothering not "oh I better answer she really wants to see me.

 I'm a woman and some times you just cant believe he could be so hot one day and not the next.

Sometimes they pull back ( usually when you feel a bond or deeper connection brewing) to see how you react.

Men (much like women) respond very well to "No contact". .

 1 email or or other form of communication is enough just like business. After that Its his loss..

 You go turn your pout into a smile with your favorite flavor ice cream or take a walk in the park.

When he calls the next day or later than he was supposed to... Just tell him how much fun he missed out on. and really sound like you had fun.  and then let him know you cant talk now,... and give him a better time to reach you.

He'll catch on and he'll respect your time if you do first. And if He doesnt respect your time then Leave Him Alone. Your time is just as if not more important as his..

You wouldn't let anyone else talk bad about your time and wouldn't sign up to be a part of a whine fest unless it's with your long lost sister.. and you'd still glance at your watch...

Comment #1

Thanks, and I agree with much of what you said. .

I do respect my time, which is why I told him we'd better reschedule rather than agreeing to meet him at 8:30 when we'd made plans for 6:00. .

So I guess I won't read too much into it?  I'm trying. ..

Comment #2

I answered you on another board. Take it personally? Why? What he does is not because of you.  It just says that his priorities about dating (online dating with Match.com) and you are not as high as other things are. So that you should keep in mind - and keep all your options open.

A man who wants to be with a woman will be - regardless of how busy he is.

Toni..

Comment #3

Well you dont want him to keep doing this sort of thing on a regular basis.  As you know, respect yourself and your time and others will as well.

,..

Comment #4

Yes he is doing what works for him at this point. It is all about him and not about you.  Can you not just be in this for what it is right now and see him on a casual level while not shutting the door to others? If you're in this too deep and that isn't possible at this point, then reconsider whether you should be in this. But again if you can deal and go on with your life, then it's fine..

,..

Comment #5

Hi. I think you are slighly overanalyzing this. Sounds like he isn't going 'above and beyond' but he doesn't seem to be blowing you off, either. I'd give it some more time and try to avoid putting all the plans on him as a 'test' to see if he shows any motivation and commitment. (I say that b/c I've done that before.) But let things unfold - initiate plans yourself along the way, and definitely continue to observe his behavior. (His BEHAVIOR not his words! ;-) )..

Comment #6


This question was taken from a support group/message board and re-posted here so others can learn from it.

 

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