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Why most women not put asian/indian or muslim on prefered ethnicities and religions on yahoo match.c

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My first question is: Why most women not put asian/indian or muslim on prefered ethnicities and religions on yahoo match.c.

My next question is: Hi, I have a question, I am happy in my relationship (thru Match.com) and only have minor issues,.

But I recently found out from my boyfriend that love means trust,.

He recently said that he loves and trusts me, which surprised me because I thought even if you.

Love someone it doesn't necessarily mean you trust them all the time. I did not realize those two were synonymous. Do you agree ? .

P.s. he's never done anything to make me doubt him...

Comments (9)

Your question was: Why most women not put asian/indian or muslim on prefered ethnicities and religions on yahoo match.c.

No I don't think it does. If trust were a requirement to love someone, no one would love anyone even as friends. I DO agree that trust is the basis of a good solid partnership and key to lasting romantic love. But love does not 'equal' 100% trust any more than '100% trust = love. They go hand in hand but it is possible to love someone who is not trustworthy and to trust someone you really do not love..

Toni..

Comment #1

Without trust love cant grow and the relationship (thru Match.com) cant be developed.  But trust is earned...

Comment #2

'...They go hand in hand but it is possible to love someone who is not trustworthy and to trust someone you really do not love'.

Absolutely agree - very well said...

Comment #3

Trust is a major component of a relationship. that doesn't mean blind trust, ignoring things the person is doing that show he is not to be trusted.  But the idea of love is finding someone who is on your side, whose side you are on , who you can trust.  Is it hard for you to trust? Have you been let down?.

,..

Comment #4

I have to agree with your BF that love means trust.   It also means many other things ... one of which is trust ( a very important one!).

But, I don't think the two are synonymous.    And unless your BF actually said that he thinks they are synonymous, he probably didn't mean that love means trust and trust means love..

I certainly TRUST people that I don't love.  I trust many people I work with, for example.  As a manager, I trust on a daily basis that they are going to do their work and do it well.  But, do I love those people?  No. .

However, I 100% agree that for love to exist trust must exist.   I don't think you can truly love a person if you don't trust them.   Even with friends.  Not just romantic love ... but, also friendship love. There are friends whom I love ... I love as people ... obviously, I'm not 'in love' with them ... but, I love them ...

So, yes ... I do think that love means trust.  Love also means respect.   Love means a great many things, IMO, for love to truly be present.   But, I don't agree that trust means love.  There are plenty of people in this world that I trust and respect but I don't love them..

That's just my .02 cents...

Comment #5

I find it hard to trust even if I haven't been let down (or haven't caught them, whichever)...

Comment #6

<<I find it hard to trust even if I haven't been let down (or haven't caught them, whichever). >>.

 .

It is not possible to trust another if you don't trust your own instincts. What is at the root of your not trusting yourself?.

Toni..

Comment #7

I cannot imagine loving someone who wasn't trustworthy. That sounds like a recipe for an unhealthy relationship. Trust is part of loving someone and once that trust is broken, it is difficult to every trust him/her again. So I agree with your boyfriend trust and love are synonymous...

Comment #8

<<Trust is part of loving someone and once that trust is broken, it is difficult to every trust him/her again. >>.

I agree with this. But like many things, it's not just a yes or no answer. In romantic relationships trust is essential for it to be fulfilling for both parties and go the distance. Knowing that you can rely on your partner to accept you as you are, warts and all, without judgement. However, say trust is broken in some way, does the love you share just disappear? No. Given the nature of the broken trust, you either work to rebuild it or you refuse access.

I have a dear friend whose husband is a bit of a dreamer. He has great intentions and big ideas but is very poor on the follow through nor does he make good financial decisions. She can't trust him to follow through on many of the things he promises or to pay things on time but she can trust him to not cheat and to give her the emotional support she needs. She knows this and accepts his limitations in these areas. Most of us have things like this that we either accept about our partners/friends or not..

My point is, love in all it's forms, is not contingent upon 100% trust being there. Trust is built over time. Love can 'be' anytime..

Toni..

Comment #9


This question was taken from a support group/message board and re-posted here so others can learn from it.

 

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