Which site has hotter and more desperate girls, Jdate or

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My first question is: Which site has hotter and more desperate girls, Jdate or

My next question is: Ok, from my other posts, you know I'm trying to let go of an ex who I thought we could be friends, but it just can't work out because of our lingering romantic feelings and he goes back and forth all the time.  He is very consistent in terms of communication, it is constant.. however, he goes back and forth - like sometimes he is really affectionate and implies we should get back together and other times I am shut down!  I am so over it!.

So today I tried to break it off for good, and I thought I was pretty clear but he sort of just bypassed what I said and was talking normal as if I never said anything!  I mean, I guess he could have misunderstood... but.. I dunno.. is he retarded or just in denial??.

In any case I am really eager to just move on with my life bec I can't take this any longer, it is torture.  So my question is can I cut out or do I have to spell it out with a big goodbye where I have to explain WHY we cant talk and be friends etc and then I just look like a f-ing jerk?   Or I have to explain that I am in love with him and lay my heart out on th eline for him to break it all over again??  I really want to just cut out but then I know he'll just text me in a couple of days and I'll have to ignore it and so on... God, I hate this!..

Comments (9)

Your question was: Which site has hotter and more desperate girls, Jdate or

Hi Blair,.

Take a deep breath!  This will get easier!!!  If you told him that it's over and that you don't want to talk anymore, you don't have to spell it out again.  You do need to stop communciation with him.  You are allowing him to hurt you.  If you need to, change your phone number.  It only costs a few bucks..

If it makes you feel better.  My ex boyfriend lives in the next building of my complex.  His eye works on the common entry ways.  It sucked for a little while, but after a little time, it got easier, and now I'm totally okay..

Do something extra special for yourself today!!.



Comment #1

Well, I didnt say it in those exact words so I can see where he would have room to misinterpret, but.. I think right now he thinks everything is still normal and ok so if I just stop communicating he will worry and wonder what the hell is going on.  And it is sort of crappy to just ignore someone and cut out on them.  I mean, I have had friends who guys did that to them and they were devastated.  I don't want to have to stoop to his level or be a bad person BUT it is soo much easier just to cut out.  I just want it to be over and this is the easiest way for me.  I feel like I will hurt more if I say anything more to him.....

Comment #2

Dont cut out on him because that will leave a bad taste in his mouth plus it gives him room (in his mind) to try to contact you again.  Why cant you just say something like "I dont think we can be friends...there is too much chemistry here and it is getting in the way of me dating (online dating with someone else."..

Comment #3

Email him and tell him that you can not be friends with him because there is too much history with the two of you and that you need to have NO contact with him and that if he cares for you at all he will respect this request. .

Then block his email and stop answering the phone!  You don't have to talk to him when he calls or emails..



Comment #4

If there is room for  him to misinterpret, you should definitly clear things up.  Then you have to be really strong and stop responding to him if he still contacts you..

Good Luck!!!.



Comment #5

That's true, I do not have to answer any communications!  I have done this before with others and I can do it now!  Thanks for all your support.  I really appreciate it! : ) ..

Comment #6

<< That's true, I do not have to answer any communications!  I have done this before with others and I can do it now!  Thanks for all your support.  I really appreciate it! : )  >>.

Yes, but ... I also agree with Vexer that you need to be CLEAR with him ... it doesn't sound like you were direct in your intentions ... like you said, he may have misinterpreted.    So, be clear about it ... first and foremost.  Some guys just don't get the message when you're being subtle.

And then ... ask for NO CONTACT.  Exactly like that ... ask for no contact and ask that he RESPECT your request.  I cannot over-emphasize this point enough ... you have to get the agreement from him that he will respect your request.   If you do both of those things ... you shouldn't have to worry about answering any of his communications ... because there shouldn't BE any further communications after that..

Good luck!..

Comment #7

Yah I just want to be clear without sounding like a total jerk.  I'll work it out somehow.....

Comment #8

By the way one of the big pushes for me in the last few days was because we had a conversation where he said if he were me, he would not have forgiven him for our big break-up... um, hello, who says that??  What a loser!  And then he said I was so great to have forgiven him anyway.  But too late!  He should NOT have said that to me.. BIG MISTAKE.. huge!  I mean, he did not market himself very well just there bec he got me thinking um.. yah, maybe I shouldnt have forgiven him.. lol He's going to be kicking himself for that one..  ..

Comment #9

This question was taken from a support group/message board and re-posted here so others can learn from it.


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