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What response rates do you get on match.com?

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My first question is: What response rates do you get on match.com?.

My next question is: I met this guy on a chat line a couple months back and we've been talking everyday, sometimes even 4-5 times a day! We talk about EVERYTING! When I say everything I mean everthing!  He constantly tells me he's never had conversations like this and I feel the same!  We have yet to meet, because I'm so busy with school but we plan on meeting up this weekend when I go home for Spring Break!  I know it sounds good, but here's the real deal!  He's 28 and I'm 20, when we first met, within the first 2 conversations he said that he wouldn't mind being like a big brother figure to me and I felt the same!  After so many long nights and hours and hours of conversations with him (on a daily basis) I have stroooooongggggg feelings for him!  I know that this would be a GREAT RELATIONSHIP!  He's even come out and said that he likes me, but I dont know what to do after that!  I love that we have a great friendship, I can say that he's grown to be like my BEST MALE FRIEND, MAYBE EVEN BEST FRIEND ALL TOGETHER!  I just dont know how to handle this situation!  Someone with EXPERIENCE PLEASE HELP ME!   I'VE TOTALLY FALLIN4HIM.............AND HARD!!!!..

Comments (6)

Your question was: What response rates do you get on match.com?.

Did you tell him that you had feelings for him??  If not, then DO IT!  This is the beginning/exciting/FUN part of dating, what are you waiting for??  Girls *generally* like the guy to make the first move and do the pursuing, but MANY men need to be TOLD that it's ok to pursue.  So put it out there, and then sit back and see what HE does.  If he is into you, he will make the effort once he knows you're interested.  All you have to do is tell him!.

Keep us posted!.

S..

Comment #1

Hi fallin4him,.

 .

Welcome to the board!!.

You need to feel things out.  Yes he said he likes you, but meeting will be different.  So hold back a little and make sure what you think you have is really what you have.  And be sure to meet in a safe place.  I also wouldn't let him pick up you.  And be sure someone you trust knows what you are doing that night..

Patience is really really hard when your falling, so you will have to work at this.  Take your time getting to know him.  You need to see how he interacts with others, etc..

Good Luck,.

 .

 .

           ..

Comment #2

I think you should hold off on telling him that you're falling for him. You haven't even met him yet, and although you may think he's great now, it can be a totally different thing when you actually meet someone and start spending time together face-to-face.Definitely meet somewhere public, and let other people know where you're going. Also, I might not understand, but it seems like in one conversation he said he likes you, but in another conversation he said, "he wouldn't mind being like a big brother figure to me." That, to me, implies that you're a FRIEND... not a potential girlfriend. So, you might want to be cautious of that.....

Comment #3

You need to clear up the platonic element that he posed to you during the first few calls because you are not "friends" if you are falling in love with him.  When you visit him maybe you could take a few moments alone with him to talk to him about it.  Or, maybe he'll be all over you and his intentions will be obvious..

It does sound good...just ride that wave right into his arms! hehe...

Comment #4

You have no idea, how much I appreciate your advice!  I've thought so long and hard about how to tell him! I'm a female that usually has no problems getting guys or telling them how I feel, unless it's a situation like this!  And i've been in love one time b4 and I knew that the feelings were mutual! But I'm lost on this one you know?  I just dont know how to say it, because if they arent mutual I dont want things to be "different" between us!  He's an awesome guy, an even better friend, and I know that he would be a GRRREEEAAAT BOYFRIEND; but if it's not meant to be, I would love to keep him in my life.........but with no changes!  I hope I'm not too confusing, Im just so into this................

Comment #5

"I just dont know how to say it, because if they arent mutual I dont want things to be "different" between us! ".

I understand what you mean.  You can feel him out about his feelings, but he'll know what you are doing...because men usually pick up on those things. .

You can phrase it something like this: "do you remember telling me you'd like to be like an older brother to me?  but Could you ever see us dating?"  He may get surprised by your question.  He could answer directly with "yes" which would be *great* for you.  He could also ask "why?" and you have to be firm and say "just answer the question and I'll tell you why."  Let him answer and if it doesnt work out in your favor...then you can easily follow up with "because I have had guys say that (big bro) to me in the past and they have wanted more, so I just wanted to make sure that we were on the same page."  By using that approach you can walk away in a very cool position regardless of how he answers.  Because if he answers "yes" you need not say anything more...and if it is "no" you can follow up with what I suggested above..

 "but if it's not meant to be, I would love to keep him in my life".

If I was crazy about a guy and he didnt reciprocate I'd have to leave his life because it would be too painful to be around him and talk to him...

Comment #6


This question was taken from a support group/message board and re-posted here so others can learn from it.

 

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