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My first question is: Website Match.com?.

My next question is: Hi everyone,Would love a female's point of view on a matter I'm experiencing. I met a really cute girl at an airport 2 weeks ago. I sat down next to her in the lobby and fortunately our flight was delayed, and later canceled. We spent around 3-4 hours together, had great conversation and laughed pretty much the whole time. I asked for her number, she agreed to give it to me. Instead of calling (due my nerves getting the best of me) I decided to text her a week and a half after our initial meeting at the airport.

My question is, did I wait too long? Do I still have a shot? Now I should mention, I do have a low self esteem problem (probably from people calling me ugly throughout the years). Do I take the vague, uninterested text responses from her to mean she's just not interested.. or should I bite the bullet and give her a call? I know I'm a really great guy who has a lot to offer a girl, but it's just not easy finding the right one. Regards,VeggieV.

Edited 12/30/2007 11:08 am ET by veggievin..

Comments (26)

Your question was: Website Match.com?.

You didnt contact her for a week and a half soooo - she has been assuming YOU are not interested in her.  Her hopes were dashed because you did not contact her right away.  She's probably a little put off by you.  .

You didnt wait so long that she cant get over it so call her and see where it goes..

People have called you ugly throughout the years?  How mean.  Only one person ever did that to me and I knew he didnt mean it.  He always picked on me growing up.  I'm sure you cant be ugly to this woman - she spent over 3 hours laughing it up with you and gave you her phone number...

Comment #1

Snafu, thanks so much for your response! Something just tells me that just because we were in the moment ..at the airport, sitting next to each other that we had this amazing conversation. She actually offered me a place to stay (her studio apt.) if I was unable to get a flight until the morning. I mean, what a sweet girl! But in the back of my head, I just think she's not interested.. that because of the 'moment' she felt obligated to give me her number..full well knowing she didn't really want to hook up. Ugh, I am fully aware I shouldn't feel these feelings, but I do. I am otherwise a confident person, just not around women and I am getting way too old- 33!..

Comment #2

Hi.. Just hoping I can read some more responses before I call her, as much as I am afraid of rejection I believe I'm going to do it. Does anyone think she'll be 'freaked out' by me calling? V..

Comment #3

Yeah...she'll be freaked out in a good way!  She didnt feel obligated to give you her number or a place to stay...silly man.  Now call her and get it over with...

Comment #4

Hi Snafu.. one thing I didn't mention- after we separated at the airport , as I found a flight that night and she found a flight the next morning, I texted her to share the good news that night, after receiving her number. I did it out of excitement that I was able to find a flight out of the airport and I ended the text by saying 'it was a pleasure meeting such a gorgeous girl!'Her response was 'it was a pleasure meeting you as well, enjoy'. So she didn't reciprocate the compliment. Is this something of worry? Ok, I know I'm being overly analytical but I'm trying my best not to feel rejected out of this whole situationAnd I'm once again on the fence that I shouldn't call! Ugh, this is so frustrating.. V..

Comment #5

Hi Veggievin!  Call the woman!  Immediately!  She NEVER would've invited you to stay with her, nor given you her number had she not been interested.  Texting her after a week and a half just makes a woman think a guy is totally NOT interested!  Good lord.  You should be happy you met someone you connected with so intensely..

Let her know you ARE in fact interested.  Let her know with class and in the way of a gentleman you want to see her in the future.  Send her a card, send her flowers and do it asap...or as soon as you are off the phone with her!   Good luck and enjoy your new relationship.   And just keep remembering that you DO have a lot to offer!.

 ..

Comment #6

Boy you like to create your own frustrations..dont you?  You are not going to know anything unless you call her.  The worst that happens is that you are still lonely.  You dont lose anything if you do call.  Unless...you feel you are not emotionally strong enough at this time in your life for any kind of rejection.  If you feel you can handle all of the potential outcomes...then give it a whirl.  If her voicemail picks up leave a message with your phone number so she can call back..

"Her response was 'it was a pleasure meeting you as well, enjoy'. So she didn't reciprocate the compliment. Is this something of worry?".

No, it is not anything to worry about because women are socially conditioned to not be demonstrative about men early on in a relationship. ..

Comment #7

Just because she didn't reciprocate the compliment you texted her later that evening certainly doesn't mean that she may not be interested. She may have also been afraid to respond too enthusiastically to your last text a week and a half later since she didn't know if you were interested. She might also not be interested. But you won't know either way unless you call. Supposing the worst does happen, and you find out she's not interested, what have you lost? I know getting rejecting isn't very pleasant, but you won't die, and every time you do something like this, it will make it that much easier the next time you're in this situation in the future. Relationships are somewhat of a numbers game, and you do just have to keep putting yourself out there and trying if you want to find the right girl.

Good luck...

Comment #8

Ok, I'm completely understanding what you guys are saying.. love the reference that relationships are a numbers game. It's Saturday night @ 7:40, she's probably out now, so I guess I'll try tomorrow? I appreciate everyones posts greatly..

Comment #9

Ok I'm back in the same boat, unable to call, not sure if this is the right time to call.. it has been a little more than 2 weeks- will she even remember any details from that day we met at the airport. am I fooling myself that I can be with such a cute woman. all these ridiculous thoughts, not sure how I can overcome them at the moment. Believe it or not, I'm a confident person.. just not with these situations. ok enough ranting I guess...

Comment #10

Just get it overwitheven if she turns out to not be interested, at least you'll KNOW, so you can stop thinking about it..

Sheri..

Comment #11

"Let her know with class and in the way of a gentleman you want to see her in the future.  Send her a card, send her flowers and do it asap...or as soon as you are off the phone with her!".

That was something you'd see many years ago...not anymore.  If she really likes him and doesnt play games that move will really bring it home for her.  ..

Comment #12

Okay...I have an idea.   If you are normally confident in other situations...then try to see her as a friend.  I'm sure if you called one of your friends to go out you wouldnt be so flustered.  I know that it sounds corny, but if you can position her differently in your mind (friend versus romance) then maybe some of your confidence will rise to the surface.  It sounds like you are psyching yourself out.  If you can psyche yourself out then you can psyche yourself up.  I'm sure you have dated attractive women before..

If repositioning her in your mind doesnt help, then you just have to jump in feet first and call her to say hello and what a pleasure it was meeting someone so nice during such a horrible experience with the airlines.  Then I'm sure you'll chat about being home a little bit, and then you can tell her that you'd love to go out with her some time and get to know her better.  If you do not have plans for the coming weekend then ask her out for dinner one night..

Just DO IT!..

Comment #13

You know you are correct in the flowers and card are  or were done in the past... but isn't THAT SAD?  What happened to manners?  Class? Letting someone know you think of them with flowers or a small gift? .

I find it very sad that 'dating' is all about not appearing to want to 'hook up' or not, or how often you've gotten a text message...or in fact that someone is so distant that a text is all they can manage to do!   .

Pretty soon, everything in life will be virtual.  I, for one, believe we are losing our ability to be social because we are able to hide behind technology if we are afraid.   Flowers?  A hand written note?  What are those?..

Comment #14

Ok.. within the half hour I'm going to call I believe. Will act as if this is a just friend....

Comment #15

Ok so you HAVE to let us know what happened after you call!  Keep a smile on your face when you talk.  Laugh, relax, have FUN!..

Comment #16

I see it everyday - men just dont have an interest in being dignified in any kind of way.  It's very sad. .

Technology will reverse our social capabilities, as you stated, and eventually future generations will become obese social misfits who cant respond normally to any living person...just a computer screen...

Comment #17

Speaking of technology.. I REALLY would love to text her first and ask her if she's not too busy for a phone conversation..then I'd call.. does this sound completely lame girls? I have the text all set up and ready to go- once I hear from one of you experts...

Comment #18

TEXTING IS LAME!!!.

I can't believe you haven't picked up that phone and called yet!!!.

 .

 ..

Comment #19

I did do the text message. She didn't respond.. oh well, this was a tough lesson to learn because for two weeks, she occupied my thoughts. It's ok though, I'm back in the hunt I guess. V..

Comment #20

Give her a call. You didn't come across as super interested so she may have responded in kind.

,..

Comment #21

OT, have you ever thought that men come to this board in order to meet women?..

Comment #22

Hii everyone, ok, so 3 weeks ago I started this thread.. well today, the girl I wrote about actually text'd me. Her text was to say 'hey, happy new year, i'm at the airport where we first met, on my way to argentina'. Could it be this is her way of starting something up? It's been 3 weeks, she completely shocked me by the text.v..

Comment #23

"Could it be this is her way of starting something up? It's been 3 weeks, she completely shocked me by the text."Yes, she is trying to start something up. I would never just randomly text a guy I didn't hear from in three weeks unless I liked him. I recommend you CALL her within the next day or two (if you haven't already) and leave a voicemail telling her it was good to hear from her, to have a great trip and to let you know when she returns (I only say voicemail b/c I assume she won't answer her phone while she's in Argentina). DON'T send her another text instead of an actual call... especially since she's leaving the countrytext messages might be lost/not delivered depending on what kind of phone she has and her service while she's out of the country.And, FYI, I really think she must like you from reading about all your interactions.....

Comment #24

Hi little bubba thanks so much for your post, it makes sense. But, I am having a hard time believing she does like me.. I think she may have just been bored, and waiting for her flight to depart at the same place where we met prompted her to give me a call. It's all just a bit shocking to me. Why must there always be some sort of game involved.. I will leave a message tomorrow but based on her lack of a response 3 weeks ago I doubt she'll even respond. No big deal on my end though..v..

Comment #25

There's nothing to lose by calling so go to it.  Good luck.

,..

Comment #26


This question was taken from a support group/message board and re-posted here so others can learn from it.

 

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