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There is a guy I want to send an e-mail to on match.com. What should I say?

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My first question is: There is a guy I want to send an e-mail to on match.com. What should I say?.

My next question is:  .

 .

My boyfriend(Jas) and I have been together almost six months.  He has a son that is 2yrs old and he has an ex-wife that seems to be around alot.

Jas and I have never really experienced the "honeymoon" stage of our relationship. We do not have the time to enjoy one another like we want to..

I work 3rd shift and he works 2nd. Which at first seemed to work out really well because we had time to talk a lot on the phone and see one another at night when something would come up and I did not have to work..

Lately though he has been going to sleep earlier and earlier and it is like we do not have time to talk. Our relationship has been built on our strong communication with one another because we hardly get any time to spend together. I see him (if I am lucky) Twice a week. .

He has mentioned a few times me moving in with him. I am a little Leary of this. I love him dearly and I do believe him and I are meant to be. I want to be able to spend every day with him but our busy lives and our work schedules will not allow that right now..

That is not all. His ex-wife is also another factor. We all get along okay. I know she is going to be in Jas' life for a long time because of their son together and it is something I am going to have to come  to terms with if I want to be with him. I am willing to do that for him..

His son is still really young. If I were to move in with Jas, I am afraid I will not be able to handle it. Or that I will do something wrong. I do not want to take his mothers place and I already feel like I am moving onto unsafe territory.

He is a wonderful man and would do anything to make me feel secure with our relationship . I love him and his son deeply.

Does anyone have any suggestions to as what I might do?.

 ..

Comments (4)

Your question was: There is a guy I want to send an e-mail to on match.com. What should I say?.

Before you move any faster, start dating (online dating with Match.com) him.  Make the time for 'date night' or whatever.  You two don't have enough time together as it is. If you move in, other things will take over..

Read the book: Are You the One for Me? by Barbara DeAngelis.

 .

Carrie..

Comment #1

Slow down, and I would put a nix on the moving in together...if not for yourself for the child.  6 months is not long enough to know if your lives are going to mesh or not.  It takes at least 9 months to really see the true person and that is with dating (online dating with Match.com) regularly 2-3 times a week.  It would scare me if someone wanted to move in together after only 6 months, especially when a child is involved.  Why the rush?.

Moving in together is not going to solve anything it will just complicate matters more. ..

Comment #2

If you have all these hesitations and doubts, probably wouldnt move in.  Generally want to be confident with one's decisions, esp if they're major ones. ..

Comment #3

It has only been 6 months. I personally dont believe in rushing something like that before a year. Nor would I move in with someone unless I was engaged. That just sets you up for trouble. If you both wnat to make it work you both have to put in extreme effort to get as much time together as possible. But you also mentioned that he has a son.

You cant go in and out of that childs life. He needs stability. My advice would be try and work strictly on you relationship (thru Match.com) with the man. Just because you love him doesnt mean you have a future with him and it doesnt mean hes right for you. Love is only chemistry.

If jobs are the problem then get a new one make changes like that. But dont move in and disrupt the childs life...

Comment #4


This question was taken from a support group/message board and re-posted here so others can learn from it.

 

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