Reporting someone to - what happens?

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My first question is: Reporting someone to - what happens?.

My next question is: I have a holiday party to go to on Saturday evening. It is at my bosses house, very casual, just co-workers and friends. I have been thinking about taking my sometimes FWB (we'll call him Pool Boy) with me to the party. He is a really nice guy, but I don't want my co-workers to start asking questions and thinking he and I are a couple. I've never taken a date using to any of these parties before so it might cause somewhat of a stir.I also don't want Pool Boy to start thinking that I'm changing the rules of our arrangement. That would be an awkward conversation."Hey Pool Boy go to this party with me, but don't read anything into it because it's not a real date." It might just be easier to go alone anyway.



Comments (8)

Your question was: Reporting someone to - what happens?.

1) you can ask pool boy for a favor - friend to friend - to go with you to a party.

2) if you take pool boy, just introduce him as a friend.

3) avoid the drama all together and just go alone for the obligatory "show your face" and then meet pool boy afterwards!..

Comment #1

I like your suggestions! However after further review, I'm thinking that going alone might be the ticket (and maybe see Pool Boy later). I just dread the thought of going to yet another one of these events, full of married people, alone. I hate the comments of "We need to get YG a boyfriend, she's such a great girl!" I know they all think that it is a compliment and they just want to help. But it's a backhanded compliment. It's like when someone notices that you've lost weight and they say "Wow you've lost weight, you look great! You make me sick!"It's just that it seems this year, I am feeling very antsy about all of this. Not really sure why, but I'm feeling it just the same.

I know the man of my dreams is not going to walk up to my door and find me, but honestly, it is easier to sit home and not have to deal with looking available and being charming, or chatty.Okay rant is over!.



Comment #2

I know how you feel - going to a party alone is not always the most fun.  I hate those back handed compliments.  Why cant people stick to the old adage of "if you cant say something nice, dont say anything at all?".

I think that those women say those things sometimes on purpose so that women like you and me (who are single) dont feel so welcome at those parties...thus getting rid of us.  Because in the windmills of their minds we want to steal their husbands, when that is furthest from the truth.  The reality is their husbands who they need to keep an eye on...not us.  So..instead of dealing with husbands paying too much attention to us and having to confront is easier to get rid of us.  From experience I can tell you that it is tiring making sure that women do not see me as a threat.  I do make sure not to talk to any man for any length of time if he is attached...I position myself with their GFs or wives.  I am not a threat to their relationships because the reality (again) is that it is not ME who their husbands or BFs want -  it could be ANY woman.  So instead of picking on me...they need to drop their loser boyfriends and husbands. .

"I know the man of my dreams is not going to walk up to my door and find me, but honestly, it is easier to sit home..." > I second the emotion!.


Comment #3

I don't think any of the ladies at this party see me as a threat. I have worked with many of these people for a long time. I really do believe that their comments have no malicious intent, it's just that they don't get it because they have not been single for a really long time. Many times people are happy and they want their single friends to be happy too, but happy in a relationship (thru as they are. Sometimes there is no concept on the part of others that you can be happy alone, which for the most part I am, but still I would like to have a boyfriend eventually.But even disregarding the comments, it gets really hard to be in a house full of couples and you are single..



Comment #4

I know - it is hard being the single one at a party.  But...if you say that you'll make sure to "stop by" then you can breeze in and out within an hour and move on to something more pool guy, hehe...

Comment #5

One thing I forgot to add...when I have gone to events alone...I have had the best times.  I know it sucks at first walking in when everyone has a date using but I had fun because I was open to meeting new people and I became more engaged in the party or event because I was alone.  So if you go'll still have fun. ..

Comment #6

I think you may be right. Besides, I have a designated driver (I'm riding with a co-worker) so if it's starts to get to me, I can just drink until it's fun.



Comment #7

Explain parties are awkward to go to alone. Ask if even though you're not dating (online dating with he'll be your "plus one" and volunteer to do the same for him if asked.


Comment #8

This question was taken from a support group/message board and re-posted here so others can learn from it.


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