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Match.com song commercial question - not by Paul Brill!?

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My first question is: Match.com song commercial question - not by Paul Brill!?.

My next question is: I assume an open relationship (thru Match.com) is when both the guy and girl have an agreement where they can see other people.  However, I am clueless about this part:.

Does this agreement automatically imply that they can have sex with "those other people"?.

Please help, Thank you..

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Comments (17)

Your question was: Match.com song commercial question - not by Paul Brill!?.

 To me, the whole point of an 'open relationship', IS to be able to have sex with other people.

 If this is something that you're comfortable doing, just make sure you DON'T GET PREGNANT or pick up a DISEASE!.

 Z..

Comment #1

Thanks, but I'm not like that.  I only asked because I found out my one and only FWB has a girlfriend and they have an open relationship.  I felt guilty and confronted him, so now we are only friends...

Comment #2

This is my own personal definition of an open relationship (thru Match.com) (needless to say both parties to one  can have sex with other people): an open r-ship is something you hide behind when you are not nearly enough INTO the person you are in this open r-ship with to only want them on an exclusive 'partner' basis, but are into them enough to want to have no-strings-attached sex with them. Men (and younger women) are a lot more successful at these r-ships than 30-something women - no way in h***  could I be in that sort of set up withough going crazy - being 37 is most definitely one of the reasons why...

Comment #3

Yes, an open relationship (thru Match.com) is one where there is no commitment in terms of monogamy sexually or emotionally...

Comment #4

<< Yes, an open relationship (thru Match.com) is one where there is no commitment in terms of monogamy sexually or emotionally.  >>.

An open relationship (thru Match.com) is generally defined as sexually open ... not necessarily in terms of other commitment, though.  I.e, married couples who 'swing' are open sexually with others but they are not open emotionally.  Though I don't necessarily agree with that type of lifestyle ... open relationships are not simply "no strings attached" ... that's more FWB.  ..

Comment #5

Ususally it implies that but it is up to the couple to discuss it thorougly and delinate the parameters.

,..

Comment #6

Thanks for your input but now I am wondering something else or maybe I am analyzing too much..

When I asked if he had a girlfriend, I also told him I like him, and then he said something like this:.

"Look, I like you, too.  I just met her when we (he and I) started hanging out, but then over the summer I started seeing more of her and things got more serious.  I'm sorry for not telling you but I like your company and enjoy our conversations,  I didn't want to drop you as a friend".

When he said he likes me too, does he mean he likes me as a friend or more?.

I told him I always liked him - did he think I meant I always liked him as a friend?   Was I not clear enough to let him know I like him more than a friend?  Men are clueless!!  But still, why do you think he said he likes me too and enjoys our conversations?  We have a lot in common.  Thanks..

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Comment #7

Ok, let's get this straight ... he met her (the GF) when you and he started hanging out ... and he started dating (online dating with Match.com) her over the summer ... while you and he were still FWBs?  Is that right?   .

Then, while you were still FWBs, they got 'more serious' and she became his girlfriend ... but he didn't tell you until recently?  (which means that he's been sleeping with both of you).    Am I still follwing this correctly?.

Now ... he's tellng you that they have an open relationship?   .

If so.... all I can say is ......

HAAAAAAAAAAAA!  .

Damn, this guy thinks he's THAT good.   Hon, he's playin' you like a fiddle.  .

This guy has a new GF (post-summer is still new) ... but, he doesn't want to 'drop you as friend' ... why?  Because you're sleeping with him ... and so is she ... and he's getting to "have his cake and eat it too". .

I highly doubt his GF is on-board and knows about you.  Seriously hon, he's feeding you the "we have an open relationship" line so that you won't feel bad about sleeping with a guy who has a GF!   .

Dump the loser now, please.  ..

Comment #8

You're right! But let me tell you, he IS all that .....hot body, and he has a perfect, gorgeous face. He's a cop - aren't all cops hot? .

For what it's worth, I already ended our FWB, but he wants to be friends still.  Here is my earlier post:.

"...Thanks, but I'm not like that.  I only asked because I found out my one and only FWB has a girlfriend and they have an open relationship.  I felt guilty and confronted him, so now we are only friends.  ..."..

Comment #9

Is this the one that you were seeing when you were seeing someone else and he found out and was watching your house? Or have I mixed you up with someone else?..

Comment #10

You and I may be from different eras age-wise.  Casual sex partners (bed buddies) have an open relationship.  They do not discuss if they are sleeping with other people and do not define their relationship (thru Match.com) with a title - absolutely no strings AT ALL. I have been in these types of relationships.   To me, FWB implies that the two are bonded emotionally on some level but can have sex with others - that doesnt mean no strings attached to me because there is an emotional bond.  The married swing partners are in a whole different realm to me and I wouldnt say that they have an open relationship (thru Match.com) either because of their marriage.  They organize their lives around swinging which takes on a life of it's own, I guess.  I knew two women who did that and it ruined their relationships...surprise!  When men say "I need to be free" and that is why they dont want to have any relationships, just casual sex I usually roll my eyes because - of course they are free. Who says that they have to stay in any relationship?  If they are dating (online dating with Match.com) someone and they meet another woman who they want to have sex with...they can have sex with her...but now they have to possibly let go of the steady girl.  To them it is all about having cake and eating it...

Comment #11

So he swapped one FWB for a new FWB...in my humble opinion.  that is why he told you that they are open.  He may want to remain on friendly terms with you in case he runs into you (and why not...of course) but if he still wants to hang with you  then he wants to keep you close to him as a second stringer.  He is not worth it. ..

Comment #12

<< Casual sex partners (bed buddies) have an open relationship. >>.

Casual sex partners are not in a relationship.  FWBs isn't a relationship.   The 'relationship' is the friendship. .

Of COURSE anything casual is open ... by definition of it being casual!  ie, casual equals no strings attached.  So, that's kind of a given to say that bed beddies can have an open relationship.  ;-).

This isn't a generation gap thing (i'm 37, if it matters) ... it just is what it is.   For an open relationship (thru Match.com) to be an open relationship (thru Match.com) ... there has to be a relationship (thru Match.com) ... which casual sex/bed buddies isn't.  .

In regard to << The married swing partners are in a whole different realm to me and I wouldnt say that they have an open relationship (thru Match.com) either because of their marriage.  >>.

That isn't so.  That is actually where the whole 'open marriage/relationship' term came from.   Open relationships were derived from the concept of people in a committed relationship (thru Match.com) agreeing to see and/or have sex outside the marriage/relationship.  The only difference between that an affair is that all parties know about it and are in agreement.   There's no hiding or sneaking around.  .

Here's the definition per Wiki:.

Http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Open_relationship ... and about.com:.

Http://dating.about.com/od/reference/g/openrelations.htm.

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Comment #13

Thanks everyone.

BTW RE:  Is this the one that you were seeing when you were seeing someone else and he found out and was watching your house? Or have I mixed you up with someone else?.

 .

No - I actually met this guy on myspace. He's 35 and I'm 33  (and his GF is 44)..

Comment #14

"An open relationship (thru Match.com) denotes a relationship (thru Match.com) (usually between two people) in which participants are free to take other partners".

That's exactly what I had with the men with whom I shared casual relationships.   I really dont wish for you to try to TELL me what my past was or attempt to define what my relationships were like with these men.  Bed buddies usually do know each other outside of the bedroom...so it is a relationship...just not a friendship where people hang out all the time.  Acquaintanceships are relationships..

FWB is not *open* (in the true sense) to ME because there are emotional tuggings.  That is how I see "open".  You may not see it that way and that is okay by me..

I dont care personally how you define any of these terms, only that I hope you date using Match.com someone who shares your viewpoints and you shouldnt care about how I define these terms, okay? .

I dont see swingers having relationships...I see them taking hostages.  That is my opinion...you have yours...I have mine.  That's what makes the world go 'round..

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Comment #15

<< I really dont wish for you to try to TELL me what my past was or attempt to define what my relationships were like with these men. >>.

Huh?  I never mentioned you or your relationships.  If you infer what I'm saying, in a general sense, as though i'm applying it to you ... that's your problem/prerogative.  I don't know anything about your past ... and never said anything about you.   .

Please dont' get it twisted or start taking things on personally.  This was purely a "in general' discussion.  It had nothing to do with you.  ..

Comment #16

"Casual sex partners (bed buddies) have an open relationship.  They do not discuss if they are sleeping with other people and do not define their relationship (thru Match.com) with a title - absolutely no strings AT ALL. I have been in these types of relationships.".

The above was my response to you.  I mentioned I have been in those relationships.  I took your response to mean that I didnt understand my own past.  I am sorry but there seems to be a miscommunication.  Please excuse me. ..

Comment #17


This question was taken from a support group/message board and re-posted here so others can learn from it.

 

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