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My question is: login for Ireland?.

My 2nd question is: So, i've never thought I would be the kind of girl to do this but the other night, I ended up sleeping with this random guy I met at a party. Spare me the lectures, I know what I did and i've been beating myself up about it ever since. The thing is, now I really like him. He seems really different from a lot of guys i've been involved with. He is just a kind, gentle giant and I think he's so attractive. On the way to his house, he told me something really personal about himself and I did the same but it felt nice to have someone to talk to like that.

Stupidly I chose his place (well, the alcohol chose his place) and we ended up sleeping together twice. In the morning, he drove me home and said "alright, well... see you later" and that was it. Everyone who knows him says they have nothing bad to say about the guy. They all like him, all the girls think he's so sweet and kind and funny and great.

So, after I got home I got to thinking "i really wish I gave him my number..." so the only thing I could do was email him over facebook ( I know... I know). So I sent him a message saying:.

  "Hey, I know this is really silly to be doign this over facebook but I realized I never got to give you my number. I really enjoyed meeting you and hanging out with you at the dance and hopefully we can do it again sometime...".

   I still haven't heard from him and I don't know if it's because he just wanted to screw or what and I know none of this would have happened if I just went home. I feel really stupid and I hate second guessing myself and now I dont' know what to do. Should I call him? I know a few people who have his number.. should I just try hard to forget about it? I don't know, there's just something different about this guy that I really really like and I feel like a big, dumb whore because of what I did... i've only slept with two other people besides him so I don't know if maybe that's part of why I like him so much. because I maybe felt a connection with him like the other two... I have no idea.....

Comments (6)

Well first dont beat yourself up for this. Just hope you used a condom ).....

Second dont contact him againyou might have to calk this one up a a roll in the hay and you might not want to do it again sees how you have reacted to this. You did nothing wrong. You had fun. Move on.

Third you are confusing actraction for lust. Yes you like him and you may be feeling a lil rejected right now but just let it go. You are not a bad person...

Comment #1

Thanks... that actually made me feel better. and yes, I made triple sure that we used condoms... I just hate it becuase i'm a huge hipocrite. It was really fun and he was so sexy and sweet but I guess you're right.. what's done is done and I have to move on. I just thought I was better than just bugs me now because he probably thinks i'm not worth dating (online dating with because i'm a huge slut  who just wanted to roll around in bed for a few hours.....

Comment #2

Remember we are human beings with human needs and sometimed they are animalistic needs. I have done it  a few times and I dont regret it. It was FUN!!! Sometimes I think we go into things expecting something to go a certain way and when they dont we get disapointed. Just because you did something you feel is bad doesnt mean you are just menas you discovered something new and it didnt turn out the way you wanted. )..

Comment #3

Hi ebeatle,I don't necessarily think it was a mistake. But you need to stop beating yourself up... and at some point, if you never hear from him again, you may need to accept that he's not interested in anything more than sex and forgive yourself. There's not much you can do now to influence whether or not he wants to date using you, you've already contacted him so what you need to do now is let him make the next move if he's going to and in the meantime, move your life forward. Don't make yourself exclusive to him. You shouldn't have to contact a guy twice, if he's interested he'll eventually answer.

Don't wait. Just keep moving forward. He'll catch up and start running alongside you if that's what he really wants...

Comment #4

Don't contact him again, he has your details so he will call you if he is interested.  Men definitely pursue what they want.  Yes, it is always better to wait to have sex, but what is done is done and I know plenty of people who have slept with a guy on the first date using and gone on to have a relationship (thru with them.  I also know many women who have slept with a guy on the first date using and then never heard from them again. .

Take a 'what will be will be' attitude and move on with your life. .

Best wishes,.


Comment #5

I don't think you should beat yourself up, either.  We're human, we do things we probably wish we hadn't, or have mixed feelings about.  I know I do.  However, reading your email to him, I feel the opposite of the other posters.  The email avoided what really happened and in a round about way seemed to be proposing more of the same.  So my take is that if he is a serious minded guy, he would think that email isn't.  I think if you really like the guy and want a real shot with him, you're going to have to lay some of your feelings on the line.  I don't have a lot of dating (online dating with experience, but that's what works for me.  Best...

Comment #6

This question was taken from a support group/message board and re-posted here so others can learn from it.


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