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Latin guy in match.com can't get a date?

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My first question is: Latin guy in match.com can't get a date?.

My next question is: So I met a guy online and we decided to meet up Friday night. We've been talking online on and off for about a month and half. He called me last Friday to see what I was up to but I was on a date, so I called him back and offered a raincheck. Well on Friday I drove up to see him, as he lives about 45 minutes away from me. We met and he took me to see a nice view. There he kissed me and from that I knew that I liked him.

He took me back to his place where we just cuddled up, "watched" a movie and made out intensively several times. I didn't want to leave but I had to go because by the time I would get home it would be past 2 am. I really think I like this guy and can see potential. I was talking to him online today and he told me that he wanted to tear off my clothes and blah blah blah. Well I told him that I felt the same way but I couldn't just do that.

I did confess to him that I was a virgin and he was surprised. I really like this guy and hope that there is potential because I can see myself with him , I just hope I didn't scare him away. In fact he told me he is willing to teach me. What should I do? I don't want to rush things because I've got my principals. I'm just hoping that he understands that...

Comments (8)

Your question was: Latin guy in match.com can't get a date?.

If he really is into you, he will respect your wish to remain a virgin until you are ready.  However, from my expereince, a guy that starts talking about sex so early and invites a girl back to his place on the first or second date using Match.com to cuddle and make out is really looking for a hook up.  His invitation to "teach" you also strikes me as a red flag.  If he continues to steer your dates and conversations towards a sexual place, be very cautious.  Even though you have been talking online for a month or so, you have only gone out once and you really don't know him, even though it may feel like you do. .

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Good luck!.

Edited 10/21/2007 7:06 pm ET by yogagirl2006.

YG.

Http://twodatediva.blogspot.com/..

Comment #1

Honestly, he does not sound like a good match for you.  First, he should have driven to see you on a first date using Match.com (or have met you half way).  Second, he should not have taken you back to his place for a makeout session.  Did he even take you out first or only back to his place? A guy who is interested in getting to really know you and not just your body will take you out on real dates in public.  Third, I think it's a really bad sign that he is talking about sex and wanting to jump you after one meeting! Ick! And telling you that he's willing to teach you? Double ick!.

The right guy will be one who wants to see you, goes out of his way for you, takes you out in public, and doesn't pressure you in any way.

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Comment #2

Well he did offer to drive down to see me but I didn't mind drivng up myself. We were going to go out dancing and such but I really wasn't really in the mood. In fact a good makeout session and a movie was really good. The thing is that I know it may sound stupid but I really  like him...

Comment #3

The way you fend off the sex in the future is by making sure you get out dancing with him next time.  The less alone time in an apt you have with him, the less likely he is to move things forward that way and the less likely he is to get sexually frustrated.  It is too soon to tell if your virginity is an issue with him.  It also depends on how old the two of you are and how much experience he has had in this area with other women. .

I laughed when you said that he offered to "teach" you.  What the heck is he going to teach you?  Most guys dont know their way around the female anatomy, how it REALLY works, how it REALLY responds to stimulation and how to get it to climax.  It is usually the woman who has to enlighten men as to how to have good sex where both are satisfied, hehe..

Have fun with him!.

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Comment #4

You drove 45 minutes to see someone you've never even met, then went with a stranger to see a view and to his apt?  That is dangerous and you are lucky nothing happened to you.  With an internet person you meet in a public place the first time - end of story..

And why were you making all the effort? Why couldn't he come to your neck of the woods, or at least meet you halfway?  And he didn't even take you out on a real date.  He wants to tear your clothes off, yes. That doesn't mean he wants to "date" you... not at this stage anyway.  I agree, you don't want to have sex with a guy you just met. Certainly not for your first ever sexual experience..

Let yourself be courted.  If you treat yourself with respect and tenderness, so will others.

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Comment #5

Again you need to be very cautious in these kinds of circumstances.  Don't put yourself in compromising situations with people you don't know!  And also again, yes it sounds like he's in this for the physical intimacy.  So be VERY careful..

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Comment #6

I think he just wants to pop your cherry...plz be cautious!!!..

Comment #7

Yowza!!!  Consider yourself lucky you didn't wind up in a really, really bad situation - like raped or dead!  You should NEVER go to the house of a strange guy you met online no matter how well you think you know him from chatting online.  That is very dangerous and naive of you.  I don't mean that in a bad way so I'm sorry if saying that was naive was offensive but seriously, there are all kinds of people online that are willing to take advantage of someone that is unsuspecting..

And honestly, like the others, I think this guy sounds shady.  The fact that he's already talking sex, that he didn't take you "out" on your first meet and instead took you to "see a view" and back to his house for a makeout session (I bet he would have been all over doing more if you had let it happen or stayed over) and said he's willing to teach you (blech, that just makes me want to take a shower) are all very shady.  I think that if you continue to hold out, that he will get tired of you and you'll just never hear from him again.  And I think you SHOULD hold out.  I agree that having sex for the first time should be special and should be with someone you love and not with some random guy you met online.  I would also almost guarantee that if you did sleep with him, you would probably also never hear from him again.

Thing is, you still do NOT know this guy despite talking online for a month and a half.  You've had one date using Match.com and it is impossible to tell "potential" from one date.  It takes considerable time together - on dates - to get to know each other.  So if you want to get to know him and see if he's the real deal, then do it.  That means public dates - movies, dinner, other activities.  No more "views" or make out sessions in either of your homes.  If he really likes you and wants to get to know you, he will respect that and go along with it..

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Comment #8


This question was taken from a support group/message board and re-posted here so others can learn from it.

 

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