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Initiating communication

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I've been spending time with a guy...guess I can't really say "seeing" him as we haven't put a label on it. Anyway, on the days we don't see each other, we text various times through the day. We've texted every day since we started hanging out. Suddenly I didn't hear from him for about a day and a half, and due to my past experiences I assumed something happened and that he wanted nothing to do with me (I'm scarred from my past!). When I finally heard from him he was all upset about why I hadn't texted him and eventually he explained he's always the first one to text/call and that he wants me to sometimes. I hadn't really thought of that as a reason for not hearing from him, as he always texts...this is legit right? I feel bad now.. but it's weird that it took him a day and a half..

Comments (4)

Your question was: Initiating communication.

It's good that he communicated his thoughts to you. He explained to you what his needs are in a relationship (thru Match.com) and he wants you to initiate communication with him. While we can get conditioned to respond to certain behavior by being mistreated (and all of us have been mistreated by men at some point in our lives), hopefully this guy is demonstrating that he is not just going to drop you out of nowhere and will discuss what is on his mind first. You would be wise to pay attention to how he is handling this and respond to him...

Comment #1

Wow, a day and a half is not that long! I would say you guys do not need to be stressing out about text messages, in general...

Comment #2

It sounds legit, I wouldn't worry.  Honest, clear communication about needs and concerns is always vital to a new relationship.

,..

Comment #3

Thanks all. I know a day and a half doesn't seem like long but it was out of the ordinary. I'm glad to hear this is a valid concern, especially after I thought he no longer wanted anything to do with me. Thanks again :-)..

Comment #4


This question was taken from a support group/message board and re-posted here so others can learn from it.

 

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