I went on a date with a guy from the internet ( to be precise) on saturday, and he hasn't g

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My first question is: I went on a date with a guy from the internet ( to be precise) on saturday, and he hasn't g.

My next question is: There is a guy I have been friendly with (have been hanging out in groups since August). He asked me out more recently and we went out last weekend which was quite nice - but I feel he is so casual vs dating (online dating with someone who I didn't start out as friends with (E.g. looks to me for suggestions for a place etc). We have communicated since and he told me he had a great time and we should meet up again soon. I have been encouraging and sent him back a positive email agreeing with him. I had previously been confiding in him as far as some of my dating (online dating with (but of course no longer).

Still, of course I am not exactly as open with him now. He was out of town and I was for part of this tgiving weekend, so he wished me happy tgiving and also said if it winds up we couldn't meet this weekend, then we should try again later. He doesn't know my schedule but I will be in Europe for work from tomorrow eve through sunday so this week will also not work. Wed eve was the last time we communicated. If it was like it was, I might have sent him a quick email when I wanted to since then -but now I think before I act.

Hours vs. minutes).I have actually not had this on my mind since last Wed eve but I am thinking again (i have a tendency to overthinkg). I find that it is almost a bit more casual because we already knew each other. Have you moved from dating (online dating with someone you were more friends with? Was the transition awkward? How does this situation sound? I feel like he should know now I have given him the greenlight no? Or maybe he is even playing games? Thoughts?.

Edited 11/26/2007 3:41 pm ET by girlmoi..

Comments (5)

Your question was: I went on a date with a guy from the internet ( to be precise) on saturday, and he hasn't g.

I have not dated someone with whom I was friends a pal.  But I know that many women do become disillusioned after dating (online dating with a friend.  The guy that was really great now displays game playing maybe not calling back promptly.  Many times men befriend women in hopes to date using them or have sex with they were never *really* a friend.  that may not be the case in your situation.  As far as things being casual you can step it up a notch with your own actions like mentioning to him that when you date using someone you like to be asked out for Friday by Wednesday or Tuesday or whatever you are comfortable with...because now their are new expectations and behaviors now that the two of you are dating.  He needs to learn what you want and need as a date using now...not as a buddy...

Comment #1

I really appreciate your post. In being his friend, he has always been chivalrous (thankfully). Pays for my drinks when we are out in a group, pays for taxi fully when we share even if he gets out first. So, I think overall he has potential..

But on that casual thing - needs to be dealt with. I did say when we were out last week that i'm not casual because he mentioned that people from the country I am originally from (and where he is from) are usually casual. I told him that I am very good with keeping outlook - so e.g. I had that outing in my outlook. He told me he keeps everything in his head.  ..

It's like I gave him a greenlight and now he is acting slower..I'm definitely pulling back myself as I was acting the same in responsiveness. I'll have to "follow the leader" now..

Otherwise, he is a good guy and I like his character which is why I think he has promise. .ugh...

Comment #2

When you say you and he mean casual sex, casual in terms of dating (online dating with formalities or having established dating (online dating with behavior patterns?  I may not fully understand.  What is your country of origin? Just curious..

When you mentioned that you are not casual in front of that group, what was his response? .

You can follow the leader and see if he picks up the pace again because for some guys it is more about the chase than the actual relationship (thru can discuss things more at length with him...

Comment #3

I was in Europe for work last week so just responding now. By casual I meant in terms of dating (online dating with formalities etc.

We exchanged some very flirty emails while I was away. Somehow I ended up joking about an expensive restaurant here (Nobu) and he sent an email today saying we can discuss about that restaurant at brunch and said "how about this weekend"? SO perhaps he is getting better. We'll see..

I wonder why he is picking brunch again?  Let's see...

Comment #4

It's in NY (famous sushi chef) - but also has locations in a couple others places - I think London and maybe LA...

Comment #5

This question was taken from a support group/message board and re-posted here so others can learn from it.


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