How would you feel if you found out your bf of 6 mons. joined match.com?
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My first question is: How would you feel if you found out your bf of 6 mons. joined match.com?.
My next question is: I have been seeing someone that attends aa meetings. we have only been hanging out and getting to know one another for a couple of weeks. it is obvious that there is an interest on both sides to continue seeing one another. I caught on to the fact that he is in aa - we met at a coffee shop, he aksed me for coffee on our first "date", and he has the "language" of aa (the sayings, he was open about not drinking, etc.) I have attended aa meetings in the past due to finding a resolution to my own drinking problems. however, i, myself, did not find aa as a resource to help solve my issues. I respect the idea of aa, and I know that it does help people, however, I know that it is not for everyone. I also clash with some of the philosophy in aa. .
I enjoy hanging out with this guy - he has two years sober...and we are still learning about each other. I like the fact that I don't feel the need to drink when i'm around him - it keeps me sober...and I am so use to grabbing a drink when around a guy because I get soo nervous. I am also attracted to him. so what's the problem you ask?.
I have a weird feeling. I don't know if i'm thinking about it too much, but i'm using the fact that he is in aa become a factor in my decision to continue, or at least allowing it to keep me somewhat cautious. I have heard of people in aa relapsing, and this is in the back of my mind should I continue to go forward with seeing him. plus since my view points clash with some of the aa philosophy, I don't want to be a stumbling block for him, or to argue with him about why certain things differ in my opinion which aa holds so solid to their core beliefs. .
I would love some insight or to hear firsthand experience from those who have dated aa members, who are aa members and date using Match.com outside aa, or those that are aa members and date using Match.com other aa members.......
Can't wait to read your experiences....
Your question was: How would you feel if you found out your bf of 6 mons. joined match.com?.
Thanks for your input. You're right, it is personal to everyone. I do respect that he has made strides to come a long way...I know that it is not easy to go from bottom to working on becoming a healthier person...just as I don't expect anyone to debate my personal beliefs about certain things, I shouldn't do that to others - dating (online dating with Match.com) or not. I also used alcohol to mitigate my own personal issues, so I understand easily how it can take control over one's life. I do have the occasional beer every now and again but I have found other means of working on my issues.As another poster stated, I am taking a risk with ANY relationship...and that is true. There are not guarantees in relationships. Thanks again for the insight...
Yes if AA is working for him let be supportive of it. And yes alcoholism is a day to day struggle - one day at a time.