Theres one guy who calls her and she calls him,who she says they are just friends of 30 years. He came to see her last year they went to vegas. She says they slept in the same bed together but nothing happened. Other than that I have only met one other guy and he's married, but it seems they have a personal relationship (thru Match.com) to go with professional. They seem to discuss his marriage alot. She says she's just a friendly flirt and that I have nothing to worry about.
She says he's harmless he's just drunk. She tells me she Loves and Adores me, and I just need to learn how to trust.....Easier said than done!..
I don't know about this. I am a guys' girl; I love guys, had only guy friends until my mid-20s, have great guy friends now. My BF not only knows OF them, he knows a couple and likes them, as well.One guy has been my friend for about 6 years, only this past year we've really started getting closer; we're starting to hang out more, he helps me with my car, we go get jamba juice once in awhile. Yet the closest contact I've had with him is once, when I was really upset, an awkward hug. I would never sleep with him in his bed, it would be inappropriate. When I was hanging out with nothing but guys I never slept with them, except ONE time, when there was absolutely no room anywhere else, and then we each scootched to the opposite sides of the bed.
The fact that it's a guy is ruder.No one can say for sure whether or not she is cheating; she may really be that much of a loosey goosey (loose as in casual, not slutty,) and see nothing wrong with this behavior, but taken all together, I'd really question it and not let her make you feel guilty for not really liking her actions. Trust is earned, not granted like a wish...if she wants you to trust her, she needs to act worthy of trust, IMO..
***If you don't know where you are going, any road will take you there. Lewis Carroll (1832-1898)***..
How would she like it if the situation was reversed? Would she like to be told she just has to learn how to trust while you are emailing women in the middle of the night and going to Vegas with a woman, sharing a bed but nothing happened. Would she like you getting constant phone calls from women. It is absurd.You are justified in your concerns. She is a major handful. She seems to need constant action and she loves the attention. She's got the upper hand and she is in control.I don't know how long you have known her.
I am sorry to have to say it like that. That kind of treatment is disrespectful to you...
As a woman who has many male friends I would think she would introduce you ar at least not me so secretive about what she is lookin at on line. If your gut is telling you she is cheating ..ask to meet some of these peopl or at least see what she is doing. If that doesnt work I would walk!!!..
The closing of her screens as you enter the room raises reg flags for me. If it were work or just friends, I would have no problems showing what was going on. As with the rest of the men, you have accepted it and her having all these guy friends around her since you began to date. Doesnt mean that your gut instinct is wrong- women follow theirs all the time and I have to say we are rarely wrong when you get that feeling.All I can ask is that if you found out that she was, would you want to leave her? What kind of proof do you need and how could you possibly question her now as this has been going on since day 1?SB.
Que Sera Sera - Whatever will be, will be...
Thanks for the reply! Well my hope is that I am just being hyper sensitive. The fact it's almost eight months together, demands me to ride this one out till the end. Whatever end that may be. Wondering if I'm part of a convenient stable, or a promising factor in her transistion from the past to our future . Thanks again for your time......David..
From this day forward, It would probably be in my best interest to try harder and keep my heart closer to me. If she is being honest, that means she has a problem with being rude. The flip side is a charade can only last for so long. No matter how you look at it, this is truly turning out to be a learning experience. I can tell you I Love this girl and hope for positive resolution. Thanks again!.
Hi David:You've invested eight months into this relationship (thru Match.com) and you love her. So hang in there for now. But you do need to leave your radar turned on. You need to be paying close attention to her actions. They matter more than her words-("I love and adore you").Speaking strictly for me, I would find all this hard to deal with. But there are women out there with lots of platonic friends of the opposite sex.
What's up with that and what doesn't she want you to see?Stay on your toes and be very aware.You are right. A charade can only last for so long. Things are so clear after the fact but love is blind. Eight months is not that long, considering the first 6 months are the 'honeymoon" stage. Time will tell..