Have you ever tried websites like

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My first question is: Have you ever tried websites like

My next question is: When it comes to an affair, to me, the blame is 50/50 always. When a man or woman choose to cheat on their spouse/significant other, shouldn't they share the blame with the other woman or man? I find it really funny that when a woman finds out that her boyfriend/husband is cheating on her, the first thing that she says is, "She Stole My Man, or she seduced my husband, or she is sleeping with my husband." That woman or man are not in the affair by themselves. Doesn't an affair take two people? And in alot of cases, it is the husband who starts the affair by pursuing another woman. The trouble gets started with the husband. Of course, the other woman doesn't have to respond to the cheating husband; she could just tell him to get lost. And of course if she does respond, she is just as much of a trouble maker as the husband involved.

Nobody forces him to cheat, or leave his wife. No other woman or man ever has the power to STEAL a spouse or significant other away from them. People are not possessions. And when it comes to an affair, the other woman/man have no power without the spouse/boyfriend/girlfriend. Also, when you come to think of it, if a boyfriend/girlfriend/spouse just focused on their partners and stopped looking elsewhere when they are in a relationship, there would be no trouble and no affairs.


Comments (2)

Your question was: Have you ever tried websites like

I say that the person in the relationship (thru who strays is the one who is responsible.  Another person could flirt, try to seduce and kiss a SO but ultimately it is the SO who needs to handle the situation in a manner that demonstrates commitment and that means stopping the OW or OM from proceeding with their behavior.  If it is the spouse or SO who is doing all the flirting and seducing then they have a choice - deal with WHY they are doing what they are doing and resolve it (by communicating with their SO or ending the relationship (thru if no good) OR they give into their impulses and needs to be stroked figuratively and literally...

Comment #1

I agree with you 100%. But I find that for a lot of people (many men blame the OM too), it's the best way to make themselves feel better. If they admit that their partner was wrong, then they have to look at the flaws in the relationship..

Anyway, I HATE to hear the 'she stole him' crap too..

CL - Women of Color  ..

Comment #2

This question was taken from a support group/message board and re-posted here so others can learn from it.


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