So your saying you should call or text the guy your interested after the first date?.
I don't think you should ever text someone unless you're in a relationship (thru Match.com) with them. Texting is the worst if you actually want a response.I DO think it's ok to call someone after a good date, if you're calling for a good reason - Like to set up another date using Match.com at a specific time and you have an idea of when you'd like to meet again. I don't think either person should call to just talk. Save that stuff for in person...
Is it ok for the lady to set up the date? I have always thought that a guy likes the chase and if he really likes you he will set up date using Match.com #2? Am I wrong. ..
I never, ever call after a first date using Match.com (or 2nd, or 3rd)... he will call if he is interested in seeing you. Make sure after each date using Match.com you thank him and tell him that you would like to see him again... that way he knows..
In the meantime... keep busy... maybe have a date using Match.com with someone else!.
By the way, if a guy doesn't call me by Wednesday or Thursday to set up another date, I just figure he's not that into me and forget about him..
I'm not a big fan of following arbitrary rules that the guy has to always be the one to call and set-up dates in the beginning. Men are not that different from women. If he likes you, he'll be happy to hear from you. If he doesn't, then he'll find a polite way to turn you down. But then you wouldn't have heard from him anyway. It's not like asking him out will change how he feels about you.
They will figure that since they asked you out, you will know they are interested, and that if you are interested, you will contact them after the date using Match.com at some point. You take a risk of losing one of these guys if you expect them to know that you're waiting for the call.I agree that a woman shouldn't be doing all of the chasing. I have seen guys who were never really interested in a girl just go along with things because she kept throwing herself at him. Then months later, the girl realizes the relationship (thru Match.com) isn't ever heading anywhere and is disappointed. Calling a few days after the first date using Match.com or asking him out for the second date using Match.com isn't the same as that though..
I have read a book called "The System (Dating Dictionary" by Dr Love (just to get a mans take on the dating (online dating with Match.com) scene) and it advises men to wait between 5-6 days after a date using Match.com to make second contact-and works on the premise that each couple has a ratio of "Interest Level". By making himself disappear, this allows your curiosity to pique and you become intrigued in what he is thinking. Other signs like not listening to him etc lower your apparent "Interest Level" in him and in turn that lets him decide if youre too hard to date using Match.com or to plan a future date. Maybe your man is following some dating (online dating with Match.com) tips from him and will call you soon if he enjoyed himself as well. Fingers XXXed!SB.
Que Sera Sera - Whatever will be, will be...
That has not been my experience (nor that of my circle of friends and acquaintances as a general rule)...the experience has been more that if a woman prods a guy who hasn't called by calling first, he will often pretend to be interested (out of some misguided attempt to be polite, I guess) and then you find yourself not really knowing what's going on and whether he's interested or not..
If the woman has made it clear on the date using Match.com that she had a good time and appreciated his efforts, then a guy who's interested is going to call and ask her out again. .
"If the woman has made it clear on the date using Match.com that she had a good time and appreciated his efforts, then a guy who's interested is going to call and ask her out again."This is totally my experience, too.Also I think there is a notion floating around a woman's mind that after a first date, a man needs to call just for the sake of calling - Most men won't call a woman they barely know just to chat. They'll do it when they have an idea of when they want to meet up again...
My experience has been the same. When they want to see you again, they will make it known. I am seeing someone who took about three days to get back to me after the first date...he works and is raising his kids. He has never asked me for the next date using Match.com on the date using Match.com itself...he does ask if I'm free the next weekend, and calls during the week to check in. Maybe a short text message here and there. He's so darned reliable it's scary (good)!Others who have wanted to see me again either asked on the date, or let me know within a couple of days.Guys who went silent for more than that...never hear from them again. Somebody is giving advice to wait for 5-6 days? That wouldn't pique my interest- that would really annoy me!..
No, don't call him. If he's interested, you'll hear from him again - and don't change your plans for him. When he asked you out for the 6:00pm timeslot but you were out with friends, you should have remained out with your friends and seen if he would have set another date using Match.com aside for you. Now he may well think that you're a soft touch and will call for last minute dates when he has no-one else better for that moment..
It's his job to chase you. If he hasn't confirmed a time for the date using Match.com when he asks you out, assume the date using Match.com will only happen if nothing better turns up for him before his 'date' with you so take the hint from him. If he's serious, he'll say something like 'pick you up at 8:30pm'. If he does this, then you are ready to go for 8:30pm and act like you always expected him to show up..
I'd wait and next time I'd also not accept a date using Match.com at 6 pm when he's supposed to call you earlier in the week. Set boundaries for the way you want to be treated and don't accept less.