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First Road Trip.

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I'm from NYC and my bf and I want to plan a weekend road trip. I don't know too many places to go that aren't toooo far. So I suggested Mystic Connecticut which is a place that is really nice, relaxing and a nice couple spot. The thing is I've been there once or twice before with my first long term bf years ago. My current bf asked who I went there with when I was there. I didn't know what to say because I didn't want him to think badly that I would want to take him somewhere where I've was with another man.

So I fibbed and told him I went with friends. I just really love the place and think that he would too! It's right by some casinos also and I just know we would have a great time. What do you think of this type of situation? Should I have just told him? I KNOW he wouldn't have liked it. Or should I just look into other ploaces to visit and leave this for a later time when we've been together longer. Considering this would be our first trip together..

Comments (6)

Your question was: First Road Trip..

Personally,  why not just pick another place?  No point starting off with a whole lot of complications.  They you won't have to worry about it...

Comment #1

I don't think you should have lied.  There's nothing wrong when asked directly to say you went there with an ex. He knows you have a past that he wasn't involved in; just like he has a past that you have nothing to do with...

Comment #2

I know and I agree. I think I was just caught off guard on how to approach the situation and said the first thing that came to mind. I've never had to deal with that before. I just know from experience he tends ot over react about ceratin things and doesn't like talk ing about he past. Anyway, I think I will just look for another place...

Comment #3

<< I just know from experience he tends ot over react about ceratin things and doesn't like talk ing about he past. Anyway, I think I will just look for another place.  >>.

Well, if he's the over-reacting type ... then, he's probably an over-analyzer, too ... so, won't he wonder why you're changing the place? .

Look, I'm not in favor of lying.  But, it was something you said because you caught off guard and didn't want him to get upset (NOTE TO THE GALS:  this is often why guys lie, too ... becasue they don't want the drama!  Its not because of anything they've done wrong, per se ... its because of the reaction or confrontation they think is going to ensue if they DO tell the truth ... which is why our OP here lied to her BF ... to mitigate the reaction).  .

In this case, I'd let it go.  In the grand scheme of things, there are lies that have consequences and there are inconsequential lies.  This is the latter.  .

Just go on the trip.  You already said what you said ... it wouldn't be a good idea to try and change the plan or try to explain why you're changing it.   You made your story ... now stick to it.   Just don't dig the hole deeper.  Let it go ... there's really no negative consequence to it ... just go on the trip...

Comment #4

If the roles were reversed would you want to go where he went with an ex?  I would change the location so that this doesnt become your first fight down the road.  I wouldnt want to go where a guy took an ex. Especially the same hotel, yuck...

Comment #5

I dont think you should have lied - there's nothing to feel guilty about, I'm sure he went away with previous girlfriends. But if you want a place that's just yours for a first trip - one suggestion in new hope in bucks country.  It's really charming.

,..

Comment #6


This question was taken from a support group/message board and re-posted here so others can learn from it.

 

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