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Does anyone know how much American Singles, Match.com, etc. pays for advertisements?

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My first question is: Does anyone know how much American Singles, Match.com, etc. pays for advertisements?.

My next question is: My boyfriend and I have been together for almost one year.  He is a remarkable person and I could not ask for a better man.

Since day one, it has been an ongoing battle with his parents.  We are still young (22) and both live at home.His parents have not approved of me since the second they found out about me even though they FINALLY just met me only a few days ago. They always have things to say to my boyfriend about me, always negative, if it's about the fact that I didn't have a job at one specific time, once I did, it was because I smoked, once I quit, it was because he is SUCH a decent young man I am with him because I want to get pregnant and trap him!Now the new argument is the they think I am offically not the right person for him and I am not a go-getter.This is ruining our relationship.My boyfriend has the upmost respect for his parents, if we were older and had the funds we would just move out on our own but can not do that right now.  He can only stand up for me so much without feeling as though he has disrespected them.

I am a very independant, smart, good young woman.  I would not hurt a fly, especially him.  I normally wouldn't let others judgments of me upset me when they are wrong, but this is the parents of the man I want to marry who is constantly putting me down, and when it all comes down to it, the only reason we get into heated arguments..

As time goes by, I do not know what to do, or what to think.  Do they want him to get rid of me because I am white and he is black? Is it that deep? I need advice, any thoughts, or opinions. Please and Thank you...

Comments (4)

Your question was: Does anyone know how much American Singles, Match.com, etc. pays for advertisements?.

Why is he telling you all of the hurtful things his parents say about you?  And why is he not defending you to his parents if knows differently about you?..

Comment #1

<<As time goes by, I do not know what to do, or what to think.  Do they want him to get rid of me because I am white and he is black? Is it that deep? I need advice, any thoughts, or opinions. Please and Thank you.>>.

Hard to say what the real issue is - but it could be racism and it could be something else entirely - like the fact that it's not you personally they dislike, but anyone who takes their 'baby' away from them.  The sad truth is lots of young adults face familial disapproval of the one they love for ' good reasons' that are really based in fear. And it very often does create such conflict between everyone that the relationship (thru Match.com) with one party doesn't survive - either he severs ties with his family unless or until they accept you as his chosen one - or he severs ties with you.

Now - it's easy to say he should just defend you and that be the end of it. I agree that he should not allow anyone to disrespect someone else that he loves for any reason - but walking away from family is hard. I would be very hard pressed to give up my family for anyone as they are part of who I am.  That said, he is also still not fully his own man and therefore not emotionally prepared to take a stand against those who mean so much to him.

It really comes down to this right now - he may not be willing to give them up for you, or you for them - but that doesn't mean that you have to suffer unkind words from anyone. So let him know that you are deeply hurt by his willingness to tolerate hurtful things being said about you by his family and that you also ask that he refrain from repeating the hurtful things said about you to you.  That is him perpetuating the wrong done by his parents for no good reason. Always show respect and kindness towards his family - set the example that the 'mature' ones should follow.  Tell him what his parents think of you is none of your business and you'd rather not hear it..

And be mentally prepared for the possibility that you might eventually break up over this - don't 'worry' about it - but know that it's a real possibility.

Hon, no one should be subject to hurtful words by anyone - and to know that your SO is not doing his part to not stop the flow is hard. He needs to know that by allowing his family to disparage you, it drives a huge wedge between you and keeps you as an 'outsider'.  You may not be able to change how they feel about you, but you can certainly not tolerate bad behavior from anyone, including your SO ( and not defending your honor by stopping the disrespect IS DISRESPECTFUL)  That is your role here - show no disrespect but also ask those who are disrespecting to stop.

Toni..

Comment #2

Please look at ragingangel08 questions in the post:.

Why is he telling you all of the hurtful things his parents say about you?  And why is he not defending you to his parents if knows differently about you?.

The thing is it really has nothing to do with race.  I was once in the same situation as you were with parents of a guy I dated and he did that same thing.  There were other things wrong and I left him.  These are parents that can not let go of their son.  Is he an only child or their only son? .

It can be difficult and hard but you need to decide if you can take this form of treatment, especially if he is not sticking up for you.   Is he telling you that you need to stick up for yourself with his parents, if so that may be a sign to run and find another man that will treat you better, and his parents will respect the wonderful person you are.  By the way this can show a lot about a guy if he doesn't stick up for you now, what type of man he will be.  He will continue to let his parents live his live for him, tell him things like what to do, etc.  They will constantly be in your relationship (thru Match.com) to where they will destroy it, and sometimes it can destroy your confidence in yourself. .

There is a whole mess of things you need to think about.  And you are both still young in life. ..

Comment #3

I agree - you need him to stick up for you, not silently listen to others put you down, and then tittle tattle..

,..

Comment #4


This question was taken from a support group/message board and re-posted here so others can learn from it.

 

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