Did I expect too much?

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What do you guys think about this?I met this guy nearly three months ago. After a few months of a crush, we finally talked to each other and exchanged numbers. Wed talk on the phone pretty frequently, nearly every other dayhe was pretty upfront about the fact that hes extra busy with his two jobs and his hobby of teaching karate. I thought to myself, ok, I can appreciate a man with a full life He would always say that we needed to connect and get together for dinner or a movie, but hed NEVER make a definite plan. A few times, hed call me on a day he had a few hours free and ask if I was available. Im busy, too, and prefer at least a days notice to hang out.

So, after three weeks, I suggest we meet for coffeewe did, and it was cool. After that, he still never asked me out. So, I stopped calling him as frequently because I figured he wasnt really interested. A months gone by and we have not once been on a date using that he initiated. I finally told him that, while I do like him (we have great conversations when we do talk), it seems like hes just too busy to get to know me, or maybe it's not important enough to him..

Comments (5)

Your question was: Did I expect too much?.

No, not in a general sense, but obviously you expected too much from THIS guy, since he wasn't willing or able to make spending time with you a priority. I wouldn't have been happy with what he was offering either, though, FWIW, so I don't think you were being at all unreasonable. I think I would have phrased it differently to him thoughmore like, I'm really looking for someone who has more time to spend with me so this isn't going to work for me.Sheri..

Comment #1

It looks like this guy is looking for a woman who will do all the work of dating (online dating with and he doesn't have to extend himself. You didn't expect too much at all...but keep this experience in your mind the next time you meet someone with a packed schedule. You did the right thing in letting him go...

Comment #2

You are not expecting too much.  If he's like this now in the "courtship" stage I'm afraid to think about what he'd be like later.


Comment #3

Mali2579 - I'm sorry to say that, but have considered the fact that he may already be involved with someone? I have been in this situation and the fact that he cannot make any definite plans suggests that there is something else than work holding him back. My advice to you: run, believe me, this is not something you want to find out 2 years into the relationship...

Comment #4

Mali, I'll tell you how a man who is interested in you will treat you, he will want to be seeing you as much as he can. He will try to impress you and be at his most good behaviour. You will feel that he wants you. If you have the feel that he is not interested, you might be right.This man shows no interest from what you have said. I'd look elsewhere.Hope you find someone soon...

Comment #5

This question was taken from a support group/message board and re-posted here so others can learn from it.


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