I took up belly dancing. Honestly, any dance, not just raks sharqi, makes me feel so much more like a woman. Beautiful, graceful. I try to keep that feeling with me even when I'm not dancing. My way of reminding myself that I can be beautiful too, that it's not just for "those people" in magazines or on TV...
I ordered a ballroom dancing dvd, maybe I will put it in this morning. I have always wanted to learn. They look so beautiful. I asked DH years ago to take lessons with me. Maybe now he would. I signed up for belly dancing once and talked myself right out it.
I am working toward realizing I am not I high school and most adults act appropraitely...
Tough subject, when I weighed 50 lbs less, I still felt over weight when I tried on clothes even though I was a size 4 (sounds crazy). I think it gives me something to think about because I know I will get to 135 again but how do I mentally think I am at a healthy weight and stay there. Great area to think about as we all lose weight and get healthy!..
I have looked back at pictures and thought oh to be that fat again. I remember thinking at that time how huge I was but it looks super appealing now. I've done a lot of research about self esteem and self image but I never find exactly what I'm looking for.
I know I haven't been very helpful but I want you to know that you're not alone...
I think this is a struggle all of us yo-yo dieters deal with and if I don't get to the bottom of it, how can I be successful now?..
I've spent the last 10 years (maybe more) avoiding cameras like they're radioactive.
Because I'm bound and determined to finally shed this excess weight, and because I know that even after I've rid myself of a substantial amount, it's likely that I'll still "feel" (and see myself as) fat, I finally broke down and had a co-worker take three "before" pictures of me.
...that's also when I knew I was serious about it, this time; I'd never before.
Committed to recording my situation like that.
I would expect I'll have to refer back to the "befores" for inspiration in maintaining when(not "if"!) I reach goal, since I know from experience (though not to *this* degree) that I'll likely still feel the same in my body as I do now.
(I'm hoping I'll be brave enough to post the "befores" when I have some substantially different "part ways" to off-set the horror)..
I think it takes the brain a while to catch up with the body. I also have the same fears that when I get to goal I'll feel that I still look 200+ lbs..
I am certain that I suffer from body dismorphic disorder because just like many of you, I can clearly remember feeling overweight and feeling down on myself when I weighed less than my current goal weight! I can remember that very clearly and I know that along with all the effort I am putting into losing the weight, I need to put the same level into changing the way I think about myself. I personally feel that is the harder of the two challenges!..
I havent even thought about seeing myself as still overweight whenever I get to goal...i guess I'm just not that far ahead yet. But some people here mentioned dancing which is a great idea.
I'm an outdoor person and I've been a hermit (except for going to work) for the last two years. And I live in an area where there are a lot of opporutnites to hike and camp. I'm going to get back into it very soon, I joined the Sierra Club yesterday.
I will know I'm getting healthier and lighter when I'm hiking and going up hills gets easier as the time goes by, or I'm not gasping for breath on flat terrain.
You should start imagining yourself thin, instead of focusing on not-thin. You can train your brain to see yourself differently. Doing soemthign phyiscal for your body is always a good thing. Maybe even some meditation.
You dont have to live with a fat brain after you've reached goal......
I have looked back at pictures and thought oh to be that fat again. I remember thinking at that time how huge I was but it looks super appealing now.
Jen...why does being fat again seem appealing?..
I can say my own personal experience is the my brain has not caught up completely with my body. Sometimes I will catch my reflection and not even realize that it's me. I KNOW that I'm wearing 14 and 16's now and I still find myself reaching for bigger stuff on occasion. I have read a bunch of articles that say it takes TWO YEARS for your brain to catch up so don't despair..
The thing that helps me the most is getting rid of my big clothes. Soon as I am down a size, I get rid of the big stuff. Honestly, at first I kept wearing it and all that did was mess with my head. And I understand that it's hard to get rid of things, but that's what thrift stores are for..
I so agree with everyone here! Ours brain are NUTS! I used to weigh 235 lbs. I "knew" I was fat, but never "thought" I was fat! Now that I'm around 142 lbs, I "feel" fat. I can feel when I'm bloated and my pants don't fit or I see that ugly thunder thigh/huge butt in the mirror..
But I'm training for a 1/2 marathon, and while I may "feel" fat, I'm doing it and could never even thought about doing it at 235 lbs!..
I think it was Orlafin who said it in her blog - we tend to wear our fat as armor. It insulates us from so much in the world and now we need to deal with those issues head on. No more retreating behind food and our bodies. Her blogs are very inspirational if you've never read them...
You dont have to live with a fat brain after you've reached goal.
Logically I understand this. Emotionally how do I catch up? I have gained and lost the same 100 pounds several times. EEK I never saw myself as anything but the biggest mom in the room, the frumpy one. You name it.
Two years for my brain to catch up......okay that is a start. TIME that dreaded awful word in so many ways...
There was an article about this on MSNBC a while ago, they called it "phantom fat". Basically, it takes the brain time to catch up with the body..
Despite being written for women, I am glad that it mentions that it applies to men more and more. It sure describes what I have delt with my whole life!..
Sorry to take the thread on a tangent for a minute but how are you doing this on 5&1? Or are you doing it on 4&2 and is it helping?.
I have plans for doing a 1/2 in Aug and I'm struggling now doing 10Ks on 5&1 (I totally run out of gas at 5 miles)..
Any tips would be appreciated...
LOL...Sorry! I wasn't actually fat but at that time in my life I thought I was. So "that fat" was actually much smaller than I am today. So I've LOVE to be that fat again...
I get the whole brain not caught up with the body thought. I have lost 12.4lbs and I say to myself I've lost 12.4lbs but I don't say I now weigh ###. So I keep thinking that I weigh the same as when I started but in reality I weigh 12lbs less. It's weird how I think or don't think about it...
I'm new and scared about all of this self-image stuff. Maybe I have been stuffing myself for the same reasons that other people have been. To hide? My son went away to college and I started to lose weight and now he is home(quit) and I have gained 40 lbs of the weight back. Stress-related?..
3 yrs ago I worked very hard and lost about 60 lbs that I had put on in an unhappy relationship. I got rid of the guy and started working out hard and watching what I ate. When I weighed 140-145ish I felt sooo good and healthy but I still thought of myself as weighing 200lbs. It was such a surprise when I realized that guys in walmart, or on my college campus, or at parties would notice me or just start talking to me. It did really give me a much higher self-esteem and I finally started to feel attractive and that "fat me" I felt like eventually dissappeared. But I got comfortable and started to slowly gain weight after a year...
And I am back where I started from.
"Fat me" is back and I want to be healthier and thinner again, and I am committed to doing it, but at the same time sometimes I feel like I will be "fat me" forever.....
Thanks for the article Merzzie. I know for myself one of the reasons I gain the weight all back is I never have seen a difference in the mirror and I am in denial when I have to buy a bigger pair of pants. I really need to work on this NOW so that as I do have a smaller body I have a healthy mind to go with it...
I purchased a Wii, the wii fit and another excercise program. It's fantastic to use when I cannot get to the gym...
Well, if it takes two-years for the brain to retrain itself, why not help it out? We listen to ourselves all the time why not start talking to ourselves instead, telling ourselves the truth. Maybe it'll speed up that process..
The only person I've known to discuss this concept, in fact that's where I got the idea, is Dr. D. Martyn Lloyd-Jones, a 20th century British Christian theologian. He wrote about it in a book called "Spiritual Depression." I haven't read it, but here's a link where you can read a quote that relates how this process works, learning to talk to ourselves rather than listen to ourselves. 'Cause, face it, we're not so good at telling ourselves the truth, and that's a big part of why we're here, so retraining our "inner liar" has got to be a big part of our Medifast journey. At least for me.
Time to start a radical truth-telling campaign to help establish a truer self-image!.
Okay, so here's the link. If Christian spirituality is offensive to you, then WARNING!, stay away! There're quotes from the Bible and everything, so take it or leave it at your own discretion. Glean what's useful to you, and leave the rest. If anyone knows of another perspective on this issue, please share. Thanks!.