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Can anyone explain the match.com dynamic?

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My first question is: Can anyone explain the match.com dynamic?.

My next question is: HelloI have had a crush on a guy for a few years. We went to school together, but his father was my professor in university, so I felt weird telling my crush that I like him. I still feel weird to tell him how I feel. I think he flirts with me. We talk on occasion and see each other around. Occasionally, we cross paths and hang out.

What do you suggest? Is there a way I can get his son to talk about how he feels about me, so I know if I should bring it up? I dont want to be manipulative, but Im not sure, if I should forget about him or open lines of communication to see where it might lead. My crush is also single right now!!!.

Edited 12/23/2008 7:48 pm ET by purple_lily8..

Comments (4)

Your question was: Can anyone explain the match.com dynamic?.

You already mentioned to him that you would like to be invited to a performance. Why not see if he is interested in spending time with you before you reveal your crush to him?..

Comment #1

We were kind of stuck some place, so we stayed in and watched movies for the entire day (7-8 hours). Nothing happened! I'm so shy, I couldn't tell him. We were suppose to go to the theatre, but he got upset when I invited someone else. I didn't know what to do, but go along and stay in. He is so moody, which makes him really hard to read. So, I keep waiting, which is why I put him in the back of my mind, because I'm afraid to tell him in fear of rejection and jeopardizing our friendship! Terribly confused.....

Comment #2

NEVER (almost) reveal a crush - at least by blurting it out! It makes the recipient nervous. You can express / show affection without going out on a limb like that, and the more casual it is, the better it is. You can even say something like "I like you" which will get his attention but that won't putting him in an awkward position. And if you like the guy, invite him to something, anything casual - coffee, lunch, cocktails after work, a concert. You can even pay him compliments, but don't blurt out the "C" word...

Comment #3

 I'm with NewYorkGuy. NEVER reveal to someone that you like them. There's no need to. Here's why. If someone likes you they make an attempt to be around you more, make plans and even take things to a physical level. If they don't do these things, their actions are telling you how they feel..

 Just like if you don't do these things with him, HE may feel that you two are 'just friends'. So your "shyness" COULD be telling him that you're not into him. Learn to get over your shyness. I don't say that to be mean either. Imagine all of the things you've missed out on in your life b/c of this thing you call "shyness." To me, learning to overcome that is a big deal, not some guy you have a crush on. This guy is just a reminder that you have something BIGGER to work on in your life. It's time...

Comment #4


This question was taken from a support group/message board and re-posted here so others can learn from it.

 

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