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Besides E-Harmony and Match.Com What are some good dating sites?

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My first question is: Besides E-Harmony and Match.Com What are some good dating sites?.

My next question is: I'm dating (online dating with Match.com) a man that I used to date using Match.com last year. We stopped dating (online dating with Match.com) because I was too clingy for him. So now we see each other, but I make sure not to discuss anything serious about dating. We've had sex, and I make sure I am out of his place by dawn. I let him call and do not make any first moves. If I am available when he calls, then we'll see each other.

So now he calls me, after I leave him. He is acting clingy now but when I did it, he thought it was a major turn-off. So why is he reversing himself since this is very confusing. I'm following the rules he set - low key, no cling, easy interaction with no discussion of the future...

Comments (8)

Your question was: Besides E-Harmony and Match.Com What are some good dating sites?.

I will tell you that one night I really needed to talk to my boyfriend and I couldn't reach him, I called him literally maybe.. 50 times.  That's right, over and over like a real psycho.  The next morning he called me first thing, like 7:30am on a Sunday.  He had fallen asleep.  He said he was worried about me because he saw all the missed calls.  In my experience, when it is a real and true connection, when a guy is so so into me and me so so into him, he doesn't think I am clingy.  He likes to hear from me, he likes to see me, etc  If it's real, we don't even worry about that stuff.   ..

Comment #1

You might want to point out the contradiction to him.  It is no fun dating (online dating with Match.com) someone when you are feeling as though you are walking on eggshells and watching your every move - why are you still dating (online dating with Match.com) him?..

Comment #2

Hi Snafu,.

I'm still dating (online dating with Match.com) him because I am attracted to him. And men have called me clingy in the past, so now I just keep my distance and keep busy so I don't show more interest in the man than he shows toward me. You are so lucky to have a bf. I have not had a bf in over a decade and it did not last very long. I date, but it never leads to anything long term. So I have lowered my expectations.

So I have decided to get what I can from the man I date using Match.com and not ask or expect more. Yes, I am sure someone will reply stating that I have low self worth issues, but that's not true. I just do not know what men want or understand men, so now I just act the way they want me to and hope for the best. When the sunrises or after sex, I just leave, it's better that way..

Hope that explains more...

Comment #3

I personally don't really think about what *they* want esp in the beginning, I just care about whether the guy has what *I* want.....

Comment #4

I understand your point. If I think about what I want in a relationship, I will continue to be single and never married. I've never met a man who had what I wanted. I always try to adapt to what they have to offer. My expectations of what a real relationship (thru Match.com) is like, are just too high. So now I simply accept what the man has to offer - however limited...

Comment #5

I dont have a boyfriend...maybe you have me confused with another poster..

"I will be 38 in a few weeks and I have come to the realization that not all women are capable of having a ltr or marriage. So I have decided to get what I can from the man I date using Match.com and not ask or expect more. Yes, I am sure someone will reply stating that I have low self worth issues, but that's not true. I just do not know what men want or understand men, so now I just act the way they want me to and hope for the best. When the sunrises or after sex, I just leave, it's better that way.".

NO, NO, NO.  While not all people are capable of being able to sustain a long term relationship (thru Match.com) or marriage, that doesnt mean you are one of them.  Your above statements are very sad.  Here's what I feel about dating:  most men that you will encounter are not worth dating, but how do you get to know someone without dating (online dating with Match.com) him?  The keepers...the long term relationship (thru Match.com) guys..."get" you.  They want to be close to you and affectionate with you and talk to you.  Dont act the way that they want you to act...be yourself.  I dont know what behavior led some men to call you clingy but being a normal affectionate person who likes to hear from her BF and see him is not clingy. If your style doesnt match theirs...then you dont need to date using Match.com them...but dont see it as a flaw in you.  Those men need to tossed out...including this moron you are dating.  How dare he say that to you and then turn right around and behave that way?!  Arent you angry?  The problem is this...one day you'll meet a keeper and then he'll feel you dont care because you just leave after sex...then what?..

Comment #6

Hi Lonelygirl.

I'm going to jump into this one late..

I think that it is a good thing to work on things that we don't think we are very good at - like being clingy.  But I think you may have taken this a little too far.  Not all people are the same and each guy you date using Match.com will judge clinginess differently.  If you man is in a role reversal - it's okay to let him know.  He obviously sees the error in letting you go the first time.  But if you don't like his actions - it's okay to let him know.  Don't be afraid to show someone you like them!!!.

Good Luck,.

 .

 .

           ..

Comment #7

It's difficult to have to play act and go against your instincts when having a relationship.  After knowing each other this length of time you want to be able to be youself.  It sounds like your distance, self reliance is making him want you more.  At some point soon have an honest conversation about where things are at.  Is this a relationship, possibly building toward one or just eternally casual?  Communication is key.

,..

Comment #8


This question was taken from a support group/message board and re-posted here so others can learn from it.

 

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