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Anybody using Match.com in San Antonio?

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My question is: Anybody using Match.com in San Antonio?.

My 2nd question is: Ok, so I wrote a few days ago about "texting"and really appreciate all the helpful feedback..

So last night, he started texting and sending me picture mail and videos.  We texted CONSTANTLY from 6pm-1am  (7 HOURS!!!).  All 100 text messages in and out were him.  Even though texting is viewed by the majority as a piss poor communication tool, what if, maybe, it could work?????  I tried to back off and wait a few minutes before replying, but he kept firing them back at me with lightening speed.  I'm thinking that he just isn't a phone guy?????   I mean, I don't think he is seeing anyone else because I have been over his house and met his roommates and he texts me all the time......  I mean, I could be wrong, but he did clarify he doesn't have a girlfriend.  and I don't get that feeling about him.  Plus, I wondering when he'd have the time...errrrr  let me reconsider that, men make the time!   lol.

He invited me over tomorrow night........  so I'm going.  the one thing I am cautious about is that this is the third time I have driven to see him (he lives about an hour away)  But, he has his own house, I have 4 roommates........  so, it makes sense.  but I am really trying really hard to again, not make it tooo easy for him.  But I also think that it makes more sense to drive to him???????.

OK, I am overanalyzing again..........  lol..

Comments (15)

The guy sounds crazy! 100 texts in 7 hours?? probably doesnt have anything better to do.how old are you guys?..

Comment #1

We are actually in our early thirties.  Although I guess based on our behavior, we are "not acting our age" so to speak.........

Maybe you are right.  Maybe he had nothing better to do then to text me.  And I guess that I don't have a life either...

Comment #2

There is a huge change in the tone of your post today,sort of feeling down?? Thats what typically happens when guys start all heavy in the beginning but if there is nothing more to it,it fizzles out faster than it began.The excitement vanishes very quickly.there has to be more in a RS than crazy texts.If he is not acting his age then maybe you can.some guys never grow.sometimes too late when life has passed and have nothing but regrets in their hands...

Comment #3

You nailed it.  It actually got MUCH worse. .

I was supposed to see him last night, but he never called.  I called him......  no answer.  I drove an HOUR to see him and he apparently FELL ASLEEP!!!!!  I was livid..

Of course I turned my phone off last night.  This morning there were several "I'm sorry" text messages stating that he fell asleep and he had assumed I would have just come over and WOKEN HIM UP!!!!.

I'm sooooo over it.  lesson learned.  Such piss poor treatment.  What the hell was I thinking????.

And the kicker was that he NEVER called me.  He texted me an apology and then via TEXT had these excuses!!!!!!  All he cared about was that I wasn't pissed because he never said, "I am so sorry, I dropped the bomb on this one.  Please let me make it up to you."   NOTHING.  No hint of another date using Match.com to make up for the missed one......NOTHING.  such a waste of time...

Comment #4

Here's a lesson I have learned, the hard way, about textaholics...A guy who A)texts before he's even met you, B)makes suggestive texts before or right after he's met you, C)makes ALL his plans with you via text D)won't pick up the darn phone and call you, instead of texting for hours is NOT A QUALITY GUY.Texting can be fun. But 7 hours? Wouldn't a 1/2 hour phone call been just as good if not better?A lot of guys seem to hide behind texting. Yes, it's fun to get a few at work, but after a while, with textaholics, you NEVER talk to them, they communicate only by text.And then they disappear...

Comment #5

Be careful, I have ran into this a couple times it is a guy who may not have been able to date using Match.com you normally, but he tries to "over interest" and complement to try to hook you - it is a scam they are players or computer nerds generally.  Make them follow the regular dating (online dating with Match.com) pattern, you shouldn't be going over to his place until he has taken you out to dinner, etc.  Also you are not the only one they are doing this to is the general m.o.  So beware...

Comment #6

Yes exactly - I just met another of the blizzard texter...they text you so fast that and so frequently you think about them all the time, only they do it to all the hot chicks, and they don't frequently have the social skills to get a gal through the normal guy channels.  These texts turn dirty right away it seems like...

Comment #7

Yep, as you found out...texting all the time is a big red flag.  I have yet to meet someone who mainly uses texting for communicating who *doesn't* have issues.  It's replaced endless emailing/IM'ing as the current red flag (of course those are still red flags, too)..

Guys who truly want to connect with you DO so, in person or at least with phone calls..

Sheri.

 ..

Comment #8

I hate talking on the phone. I don't think that means I have issues. It just means I am usually doing 9 things at once and cannot stop what I'm doing to sit and chat on the phone. I dated a guy briefly who would only call me, never texted, even if it was something that could be said in a couple of words. Drove me batty. Phone calls have their place, but checking and returning texts is much easier than checking and returning voicemail...

Comment #9

I"m not a big phone person either but I hate texts even more, except the "running late, can't call, see you in 15 min" type..

Anyway, I can only say what my experience has been, and that is that every man I've dated who would only text and never or rarely call had issues.  So in my experience it's a red flag and I'm sticking to that! .

Sheri..

Comment #10

It's one thing to say that it's been your experience. It's entirely another to decide that your experience is the reality across the board. I'm just giving another point of view since several people in this thread are intent on turning texting into some kind of sign of moral decay. I'll bet when telephones were starting to catch on people said the same thing about phoning vs. writing a letter...

Comment #11

....."Phone calls have their place, but checking and returning texts is much easier than checking and returning voicemail."..... .

True, however, they weren't checking a returning texts, they were texting non-stop for hours in the middle of the night so it wasn't a matter of being uber-busy. .

Texting isn't necessarily a sign of moral decay, but it is significantly contributing to social decay.  I was a party recently, and three of the people sitting at one table were all on their phones, texting other people when the had purposely gone to this party to "socialize."  Why not just leave the party then?  Too many people trying to do too many things at once and not focusing on or truly enjoying anything at all..

It's a matter of being where you're at.  I understand busy schedules and trying to do a million things at once, texting certainly has it's place in facilitating simple passing of information, but if they're going to sit there and tap-tap-tap things out for seven hours straight, they should just be picking up the phone or making a date using Match.com to meet face to face.  They're supposedly attempting to forge a relationship (thru Match.com) with each other, not with their BlackBerries.  It's not that difficult. .

Ok, down off soapbox....

 CL-Breaking Up Is Hard to DoCL-Understanding MenCL-Ask the dating (online dating with Match.com) DoyenneRead This First:  How to Get Over Your BreakupWe waste time looking for the perfect lover, instead of creating the perfect love.  Tom Robbins..

Comment #12

I'm not a fan of texting at parties unless it's minimal and necessary. But in defense of texting and/or IMing for hours in the middle of the night, I've done that. That doesn't mean I'm not actually going on dates with the guy too. But sometimes I have a lot of work to get done at home, and I can't really talk on the phone while doing it. I also like IMing and texting because you can easily send pictures and/or videos while talking. I use this function a lot.

This is something we can't do just talking on the phone...

Comment #13

I agree about the texting. It's ok for the letting someone know you are late kind of stuff, or a funny thought here and there during the day. Some guys I was dating (online dating with Match.com) would text me if I went away for the weekend...I always thought it was because they were thinking about me, but now I wonder if it was they were checking up on me.I don't like the phone all that much unless I know the person well, then no problem. But if you've been dating (online dating with Match.com) someone for a few months, the non-stop texting gets old, at least to me...

Comment #14

Can't you meet somewhere in the middle at least? You're going mighty far out of your way. He could arrange a special date using Match.com for you at least, not just hanging out at his house..

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Comment #15


This question was taken from a support group/message board and re-posted here so others can learn from it.

 

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